The world can see the shape of you in me..
…as I create, create, create. With each piece that I write, each photo that I take and manipulate, each collage that I put together, I channel you and…Let you “speak” through me. Let you take shape in me.
You were the storyteller. People loved your stories, told so vividly you could find yourself in their midst. You loved to tell OUR STORY – the story of soulmates who found each other across continents and the ocean. I feared that with your death, you the storyteller would be gone. Instead our stories continue. And now, we tell the stories as I channel you, us, our together-life through my writings and artwork.
You were the whale – the keeper of memories, recalling details that I would forget. You prided yourself on not forgetting. I was fearful, am still fearful of forgetting. Yet now, I am the keeper of our memories. As I listen into myself, connecting with you, I do remember. As I create, I build containers for all those memories.
You were the dreamer – your dreams so vivid, you could feel the touch, smell, and taste, see their brilliant colors, follow their detailed scripts. I was always so surprised about how detailed your recounts of your dreams were. I still don’t dream like you. And, I don’t dream of you. That’s hard for me. Yet my artwork is a form of dreams become manifest. Maybe I “dream” through my art?
You were able to hear my thoughts in my voice in your head. Yes, you did. You proved it to me again and again. Now, I sometimes hear your voice in my head, calling me ‘babe’ like you always used to do. Don’t stop talking to me!
You were incredibly observant, often “chiding” me for not being observant enough. Now I see and notice things and I’m surprised because I would have thought that I’d miss more things being so encompassed in my grief. Do you let me see things?
You were patient and often told me that I needed to become more patient. In fact, the first time I went to see a medium, you “told” me during the car ride there that I needed to be patient. Then Mark, the medium, told me that you said to him the word “patience.” Through these past 13 ½ months, I’ve had to become patient. I’ve learned to sit with not knowing. I’ve learned to listen to myself patiently. Until at some point, a sign, a vision, an intuition appears to guide me along.
You were an empath, in touch with your emotions – authentic, open, honest, expressive. With you I began to become an empath, began to be in touch and express my emotions. After you died, I know I channeled you as I allowed myself to grieve without boundaries. I allowed myself to openly and honestly express what I was feeling and going through. You’ve given me the strength to feel empowered to do that despite people judging me and turning away from me. You are still giving me that strength.
The world can see the shape of you in me in the many ways through which I channel you.